.Editor's Note: The complying with is the text message of a character from Trip 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), reflecting on the occasions of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I have not created quite about specifics of this goal throughout the month I've been listed below, mainly for pair of causes: the 1st being that there has been quite little time to do that kind of composing, as well as the second thing is since I am actually not exactly sure just how relaxed I am actually discussing thoughts I show friends and family with the rest of the globe.Well, undoubtedly the globe transformed today. What I claim or carry out is actually really small compared to the significance of what happened to our nation today when it was assaulted by ... by whom? Terrorists is actually all we know, I suspect. Tough to know at whom to guide our rage and also anxiety ...I had actually simply ended up an amount of tasks this morning, one of the most taxing being the physical exams of all team participants. In a private talk complying with that, the flight cosmetic surgeon told me they were possessing a quite bad time on the ground. I had no tip ...He described the situation to me as finest he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually shocked, after that horrified. My initial notion was actually that this wasn't a real chat, that I was actually still paying attention to some of my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply really did not seem to be possible on this scale in our country. I couldn't also envision the particulars, even before the news of further damage started can be found in.Vladimir came over fairly promptly, sensing that something really severe was being actually discussed. I swayed Michael into the module also. They were actually likewise blown away and stunned. After our team authorized off, I attempted to clarify to Vladimir and also Michael as best I could the possible magnitude of the act of fear in midtown Manhattan and also at the Government. They clearly comprehended and also were actually incredibly thoughtful.I browsed the Planet Map on the pc to see where over the world we were actually and also discovered that our company were actually happening southeast away from Canada and also would be actually overlooking New England in a handful of minutes. I zipped around the terminal up until I located a window that would offer me a sight of New York City and got hold of the nearest camera. It occurred to become a video camera, and I was actually appearing south from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes appeared to possess an odd blossom to it at the foundation of the pillar that was streaming south of the metropolitan area. After checking out among the news articles we only received, I believe our company were checking out NY around the moment of, or quickly after, the failure of the second tower. Just how terrible ...I scanned the video camera the whole time the East Coast to the south to view if I can observe every other smoke around Washington, or anywhere else, yet nothing at all showed up.It was actually rather difficult to consider work afterwards, though we had some to accomplish, however on the following orbit our experts went across the United States more southern. All three people were actually working a couple of cams to try to receive viewpoints of New york city or Washington. There was fog over Washington, however no details source may be viewed. Everything looked awesome from a couple of hundred kilometers away. I can not envision the heartbreaking settings on the ground.Apart from the psychological impact of our nation being dealt with as well as 1000s of our consumers and possibly some good friends being actually killed, one of the most overwhelming emotion being actually where I am actually is among seclusion.Following day ... I presume the exhaustion as well as psychological pressure acquired the greatest of me. I couldn't remain awake as well as remain to create. Today was actually still difficult, but our company began receiving additional information, plus we had the respect of talking directly along with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, that ensured our company that the ground teams will remain to work as well as guarantee our safety and security, along with the secure function of the Place. We additionally learnt through our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, who included that the partners in the Course are actually all completely dedicated to continuing secure functions and help. These were actually never ever inquiries for me. I know all these folks! The ground staffs have actually been actually surprisingly encouraging, really understanding of the effect of the updates, and have made an effort to be as helpful as achievable. They have actually all been very specialist and also centered though I can't visualize the distraction of this particular kind of headlines coming in and the idea that federal government properties could be at risk. They certainly never avoided a beat, also when transferring control centers. And a team of elderly workers and friends gave our company a rather detailed briefing about what was actually recognized and also what was being actually performed in the government and also at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was actually very useful and kind of them to carry out in the middle of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has likewise been encouraging and practical, making an effort to uplink newspaper article when our very own properties were actually inoperable, as well as saying kind phrases ...My crewmates have been actually excellent, also. They recognize it is actually been actually a difficult time for me and also the individuals on the ground, as well as they've made an effort to become as also keeled and helpful as feasible. Michael even repaired me my preferred Borscht soup for supper. As well as they offer me plenty of area to presume when I needed it. They are actually really compassionate and also obviously shocked at whoever would do this.I recognize many folks in Washington, many individuals who take a trip to DC and also New York City, a lot of that are aviators, that I really felt certain I would obtain at the very least a handful of parts of trouble over the following couple of times. I obtained the 1st one today when I found out that the Captain of the American Airlines plane that struck the Government was actually Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I met Chic during plebe summer when our team remained in the D&B all together, and we possessed bunches of training class together. I can't imagine what he should of experienced, and now I hear that he may have risen even further than our company may even think of through probably preventing his airplane from being actually the one to attack the White House. What an awful reduction, yet I ensure Chic was actually battling bravely to the end. As well as splits do not stream the same in space ...It is actually difficult to describe how it feels to become the only United States completely off the earth at a time including this. The sensation that I need to be there with each one of you, handling this, helping somehow, is actually mind-boggling. I recognize that our company are on the threshold (or beyond) of a horrible switch in the history of the globe. A lot of traits will certainly never ever coincide again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not just for the manies thousand and 1000s of individuals directly influenced by these horrible acts of violence, yet perhaps for everyone. We will find our own selves experiencing in different ways regarding lots of points, featuring perhaps area expedition, however.It's horrible to see smoke pouring from cuts in your very own country coming from such a fantastic viewpoint. The dichotomy of performing a space capsule committed to boosting daily life on the planet and also enjoying life being actually ruined through such intentional, horrendous acts is jolting to the psyche, regardless of that you are. As well as the expertise that everything will definitely be different than when our team introduced by the opportunity we land is actually a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our country and also in our leadership that our company are going to do whatever possible to much better defend her as well as our families, and also to take justice for what has actually been done. I have self-confidence that the good people at NASA will do every little thing required to continue our mission safely and securely as well as return our team safely at the correct time. And I miss each of you significantly. I can't be there along with you in person, and also our experts possess a very long way to head to complete our purpose, yet be particular that my heart is actually along with you, and understand you reside in my requests.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the final character ... Luckily, it's been actually an occupied week up below. And also to confirm that, like our nation, our team are actually advancing our intended pathway with organization customarily (as long as achievable). Tonight the latest add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Area will be released coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (United States time), it will dock with us, at a slot never made use of just before on the low point side of the Company Element. This brand-new module will give us another location to dock an Improvement or even Soyuz and are going to give a huge airlock along with 2 useable hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan satisfies, which our team will certainly carry out a few of prior to our experts get home.The complication just before in taking care of today was actually inadequate headlines. The concern now is actually too much. It came at one time when e-mail was recovered, as well as there is actually not enough time to review everything! Plus it's too difficult to handle all of it immediately. However I enjoy getting it, and also I actually appreciate the terrific letters of support and relationship I am actually getting.We are actually succeeding aboard, obtaining our job performed, as well as discussing traits. Last evening our team had a long dialogue over dinner about the value of these celebrations, the achievable actions to observe, as well as what must be carried out. After supper, Michael challenged informing me that every e-mail he acquired coming from pals in Russia mentioned specifically to inform me how regretful they were that this occurred, extending their acknowledgements, and also inquiring just how I was actually performing. Vladimir educated me the Russian word for "acknowledgements" after talking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Celebrity Area. (Both the Russian as well as the English terms are a lot very lengthy to verbalize conveniently.) Incredibly kind individuals.For the last pair of times, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to send real-time broadcasts of radio news about the celebration and also associated tales, to be sure I was effectively informed. Every specialist that has started free throw line to review a treatment or a problem contends some point stretched hellos to me with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom informed our company that because of the wedding of recognition in the US, all day people had actually been taking florals and lining all the wall structures of the United States embassy in Moscow, as well as this evening they were actually lighting candlesticks in the road outside the consular office. Just how the world has actually transformed.Individuals just about everywhere seem to recognize the senselessness and scary in this particular assault. As well as the remarkable reduction. Moscow has actually taken care of these type of issues in the last handful of years along with flat and also metro battles, so they are actually as restless to get rid of this risk as our team are actually. However the bottom product line is that there are actually great individuals anywhere that intend to stay in tranquility. I go through that a child talked to, "United States is actually therefore good to various other countries, our team consistently aid everyone, just how can they dislike our team so much?".I hope the instance of participation and leave that this space probe and all individuals in the program show daily are going to sooner or later influence the rest of the world to function the same way. They must!However, our experts will not be actually flighting over the US while people are igniting candle lights. Do not recognize if we could possibly observe that anyway. Our team performed, having said that, see a really unusual as well as wonderful sight a handful of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz booster. Our company were eclipsing it and also it appeared regarding three minutes after its own launch from Baikonur as the sunshine attacked our terminal, so it was still at night. It resembled a large comet with a right, vast tail silhouetted versus the dark planet under. Despite some bad lighting for a while as the sunlight hit our window at a low position, I dealt with some video recording of it as initially our experts passed the rocket, and afterwards saw it start to catch up as it gained height and velocity. I shot till main motor deadline and enhancer separation occurred just like our team moved toward sunrise on the Mountain ranges. An unforgettable view in an unforgettable full week ...Life happens, also in space. Our team are actually here to remain ... Frank.